The #drwhochat Quotefile

May 1 [02:25]
<PeterJF> SJ: i'm watching you right now. I have a computer with DSL in a 
          nearby building 
<SeriousJ> dsl? 
<PeterJF> it's like lsd, but more addictive 

May 1 [04:06]
<Alden> I so want Star Trek, where you program a computer by saying "I want 
        you to do this and this and this" 
<Alden> Then I will retire to a small padded cell somewhere 
<SeriousJ> "Working. Insufficent technology." 
<Oh_sod_it> ..and it can tell you 're talking to it cos you say 'computer', 
            yet ignores you if you just use the word 'computer' in a 
            sentence 
<SeriousJ> OSI- Like how the control panel ignores Riker's butt? 
<PeterJF> riker sits on the control panel? 
<Alden> Now that's error anticipation. 
<PeterJF> spoken like a dev 
... 
<Alden> "What if someone sits on the control panel?" "Who would be *that* 
        stupid??" 
<Oh_sod_it> and doors know when you want to go through them and not just 
            walk past, and open conveniently when you finish a conversation 
<PeterJF> okay, if the heat signature is butt-like, ignore it 
<PeterJF> oh wait- we need to write a routing to distinguish between finger 
          presses and the noses of exhausted users 
... 
<Oh_sod_it> supposing he's tied up, and has to use his arse to send a 
            distress signal? 

May 3 [03:22]
<DoctorWho> And while I'm at it, I'm anxiously waiting for everything to go 
            wireless too :P 
<Alden> I have a wireless wire. 
Alden holds it up for everyone to not see. 
PeterJF points to a power outlet on the wall 
<PeterJF> that's the air amp i use when i play air guitar 

May 5 [02:36]
<Greebo_T_Cat> my dad said he was making 'breakfast sandwiches' and asked 
               me if i'd like one... i said yes. 
<Greebo_T_Cat> i've just recieved 3 pieces of bread, between which there 
               is: Bacon, sasauges, fried egg, more bacon, sasauges, cheese 
               and fried onions. 
<Greebo_T_Cat> *blinks* 
<Greebo_T_Cat> this may or may not kill me 
<Alden> crikey 
<Alden> Your dad's not Dave Lister, by any chance? 
<DoctorWho> LOL 
<Greebo_T_Cat> Gods no. 
<Greebo_T_Cat> no chilli sauce, no chutney 
<DoctorWho> hm... bread, meat, cheese, onions... technically I think that 
            covers all 4 food groups... 
<DoctorWho> At the same time, I can't bring myself to believe that such a 
            dish is actually good for you. 
<Greebo_T_Cat> nate: i never said it was 
<DoctorWho> a) I was being sarcastic, b) That's the point 
<Greebo_T_Cat> c) *munch* 
<Alden> lol 
<DoctorWho> As Thete said at approximately this juncture while trying 
            vegemite on toast, "Hm. I'm not dead." 
<DoctorWho> Though, that sandwich sounds like something I would make 
<DoctorWho> Double-decker... might even be big enough portions for me to 
            consider it a 'meal' 
<Greebo_T_Cat> Nathan 'Steak? STEAK? Just gimme the whole damned cow and 
               some napalm' Roberts 

May 5 [08:50]
DoctorWho finishes debugging the toilet 
<DoctorWho> (we hope) 
<PeterJF> oh lordy. programmers fixing toilets? 
<RedQueen> Thete: it's a rough job market out there 
<DoctorWho> Thete: Yup. 
<DoctorWho> Fixing it from a programmer's perspective too 

May 6 [04:05]
<El_Zoof> Did you fix your dunnie? 
<El_Zoof> Sorry. Dunny? 
<DoctorWho> ? 
<Greebo_T_Cat> your shitter, your crap box, your windows emulator. 
... 
<DoctorWho> "Windows emulator" LOL 
<DoctorWho> Yeah, it seems to be fixed 
<El_Zoof> So you're flushed with success 
<DoctorWho> *fwap* 
<El_Zoof> The royal wee followed by the royal flush 
<DoctorWho> *fwap* 
<El_Zoof> No more cistern errors 
<DoctorWho> *fwap* 
<El_Zoof> You may fwap all night, and I'll merely carry on undeturd 
<DoctorWho> *fwap* 
<Greebo_T_Cat> the standard of humour in this channel has really gone down 
               the pan 
<DoctorWho> *fwap* 
<El_Zoof> Okay, so maybe that remark was a tad faecestious 
<DoctorWho> *fwap* 
<Greebo_T_Cat> sorry, just trying to flush it out of my cistern 
<DoctorWho> *fwap* 
<El_Zoof> Urine good form tonight 
<DoctorWho> *fwap* 
<El_Zoof> Driving you round the bend? 
<Greebo_T_Cat> i think we're driving nate round the (U) bend 
<Greebo_T_Cat> snap! 
<El_Zoof> snap 
<Greebo_T_Cat> argh! 
<El_Zoof> Maybe time to stop taking the piss 
<DoctorWho> *fwap* 
<Greebo_T_Cat> agreed, before the shit hits the fan 
Alden stuffs Zoof into a toilet bowl and flushes repeatedly 
<El_Zoof> You'll never stop me going through the motions! 
<Greebo_T_Cat> *FWAP* 

May 6 [05:40]
PeterJF pastes http://theta-g.com/webcam again to see of ash's computer 
        tanslates the special character entity 
<PeterJF> Alden's browswers didn't 
<Greebo_T_Cat> i see the heart? 
<PeterJF> excellent 
<DoctorWho> entitty? 
<Greebo_T_Cat> nates got a one track mind. 
<Greebo_T_Cat> unfortunately, that one track involves penguins 

May 7 [21:19]
<PeterJF> someone once said that San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown likes 
          italian leather shoes because they taste better 

May 11 [03:45]
<PeterJF> all i can say is: buy the ski mask, do the deed and then you can 
          pay off the loan you took out to buy the blessed ski mask! 

May 12 [22:38]
<Alden> lol, bad pickup lines: "Is it hot in here or is it just you?" 

May 13 [02:52]
<Alryssa> Alryssa: Doing her part to make sure the Doctor Gets Some. :) 

May 13 [03:48]
<Greebo_T_Cat> Microsoft: Our operating system is just like our board of 
               directors. Its full of 'holes. 

May 13 [13:58]
<PeterJF> i think leaving leela falling in love is good in that she's a 
          liked character and bad stuff doesn't happen to her, but graham 
          did it out of spite is what i read 
<StaticShadow> why? 
<PeterJF> because she essentially quit because she didn't get along with a 
          coworker 
<NathanR> Tom? ^_^ 
<PeterJF> /dcc send NathanR cupie.dol 

May 14 [04:11]
<NathanR> They sure didn't make it easy to set up Internet Explorer in 
          Windows 98SE 
<Alden> well, no, where would be the fun in that? 
<NathanR> It wants me to install a modem, and Outlook Express before it 
          even offers to launch IE 
<NathanR> Fortunately, I /think/ I know how to get around it 
<NathanR> There we go 
<Alden> No, you *will* be assimilated <waves laser pointer thingee> 
<NathanR> Trash the "Connection Wizard" folder and it fires up IE right 
          away 
<NathanR> You WILL submit! 
<Greebo_T_Cat> Nathans in to Domination and punishment? 
<Greebo_T_Cat> wait, he plays with slackware... question answered 
<NathanR> *fwap* 
<Greebo_T_Cat> further proof 
Greebo_T_Cat now has the mental image of a penguin in a rubber gimp suit 
<Greebo_T_Cat> yipes 
<NathanR> o_O 
NathanR isn't even sure what a gimp suit is 
<Oh_sod_it> think pulp fiction 
NathanR isn't even sure what pulp fiction is 
<Oh_sod_it> lol 
Alden does a web search for gimp and finds a bunch of pages about graphics 
      editing. doh! 
Greebo_T_Cat shows nathan a clue 
<NathanR> Ash in #drwhochat with the Steel Chair 
Greebo_T_Cat flicks up the steel chair and brings it down upon the top of 
             nathans head 
<NathanR> I was right! 
NathanR keels over 
Greebo_T_Cat sets fire to nathan 
<Greebo_T_Cat> he would of wanted it that way 
<Greebo_T_Cat> ... 
<Greebo_T_Cat> well, he wouldn't. 
<NathanR> Hey, free cremation! 
<Greebo_T_Cat> but i would 
<Greebo_T_Cat> nate: thats nothing, the food for the wake is cooked *over* 
               you. hows that for value for money 

May 14 [05:52]
Greebo_T_Cat has been part of dwc since 1996. official old fart of the room 
             ;P 
<StaticShadow> so ash, youve been here since the beginnig? 
<Greebo_T_Cat> Static: under one name or the other 
NathanR has been here since 96 or 97 
<NathanR> Probably closer to 97 
<StaticShadow> cool 
Greebo_T_Cat beats you all! hahaha! hahahahaahahhaha! ha.... 
<Greebo_T_Cat> ha 
<Greebo_T_Cat> hrm. 
<Greebo_T_Cat> I have no life. 
Greebo_T_Cat goes to shoot himself in the head 
<PeterJF> no! not the lead mind probe! 

May 15 [15:45]
Alryssa has to figure out how the heck to fluff her hair up. -.- 
<gordon-r-d> Alryssa : you got a mains socket there? 
[Fwap!] 

May 16 [03:19]
<Greebo_T_Cat> OSI: I sit next to the server cabinet at the .com i worked 
               at. they were big, loud, and unpleasant. 
<Greebo_T_Cat> and took up a huge amount of room 
<Greebo_T_Cat> but enough of my co-workers... 

May 20 [00:30]
<PeterJF> am i awake? 
<Shel> nope 
<Shel> you are dreaming of me ;) 
<PeterJF> ahhhhh 
<Shel> oh wait, maybe it's a nightmare 
<PeterJF> ahhhhhgh! 
Shel remembers she still has the staple gun, the rope, the handcuffs, and 
     the superglue