The #drwhochat Quotefile

Volume III, Issue VIII: September 1999

Compiled by Nathan Roberts

Wed Sep  1
<MegL> personally I wouldn't eat bears, due to the fact they carry
       really weird stuff that can make you sick
<Alden> Like pikinic baskets?

Wed Sep  1
<Nathan_Roberts> y2k!
<Theta-G> 1001010100110101011010010101010101010101010010101001010010101001010
<random_c> You do not WANT TO KNOW what that sounds like through text-to-speech

Wed Sep  1
<Nathan_Roberts> SEX!!!!
<Theta-G> Today's sex is Tart  la Whipped Cream. Enjoy your dessert.

Wed Sep  1
<Nathan_Roberts> WTQF!
<Theta-G> Today's quotefile is Text  la Late. Enjoy your wait.

Fri Sep  3
<Alden> OK, now that's weird - I rebuilt all the icons...  In the
	explorer windows, the zip files have the right icon, the the
	"save file" dialog they don't...
 * Alden gives up. Windows is just too weird.
 * Nathan_Roberts takes it Alden is having another "I Want Linux" moment
<Alden> Nate: I'm having an "I want an abacus" moment.
<Alden> Bit hard to find a compatible video card though.

Sat Sep  4
<Nathan_Roberts> What's the difference between the Beeb police box and
		 the real thign?
<Alryssa> the real thing doesn't wobble.

Sun Sep  5
<Jondar> maybe if I leave, ChanServ will decide to op someone instead
	 of deopping them :)
<Alden> Jason: And maybe if I bend over, monkey's will fly out of my ass. :-)

Sun Sep  5
<Nathan_Roberts> So now I've got the NeXTSTeP-alike window manager,
		 the Windows95-alike file manager, with a MacOS8 folder icon
<Nathan_Roberts> If I ever realease my own Linux distribution, it will
		 probably end up being called Scizophrenux %)

Sun Sep  5
<Theta-G> manos starts, and you're like "NOTHING IS HAPPENING! WHY ARE
	  THEY FILMING IT!?" then some thing happen. Some pretty
	  stupid tacky things and you're like "it made more sense when
	  nothing was happening."

Sun Sep  5
 * Edict_of_Expert wonders exactly when AOL turned evil.
<Edict_of_Expert> Why. I'll just bet that AOL was once a sickeningly
		  cute slave boy from Tatooine.

Mon Sep  6
 * Nathan_Roberts wonders if it's normal to be moved to tears by the 
   last episode of Logopolis....
<McGannDoc> tears of laughter?

Mon Sep  6
<Theta-G> i'm very happy for you kris, i know that you are a good
	  person and deserve it massively. but i still get to think
	  you're being kinda crass.
<The_Anti> true.
<Nathan_Roberts> He's not being Crass, he's being Kris!

Mon Sep  6
[Nathan gets booted offline]
 * Nathan_Roberts boots his ISP into the next dimension
 * Nathan_Roberts boots his ISP into the next dimentia
<The_Anti> HAH! I won't fall for this trick.
*** The_Anti has been kicked off channel #drwhochat by
    Nathan_Roberts (But I will.)
*** The_Anti has joined channel #drwhochat
<The_Anti> hahahah
<The_Anti> funny
 * Nathan_Roberts cackles
<The_Anti> regular comedian, aren't you?
<Theta-G> no, nate's the deluxe edition comedian
<Nathan_Roberts> I try
<The_Anti> thankfully, that's all you can do. try.
<The_Anti> :P
 * Nathan_Roberts boots Anti into the next dimentia
<Nathan_Roberts> (Again?)
<Theta-G> yeah.
<The_Anti> sigh
 * The_Anti takes the big "KICK ME" sign that somebody stuck on his back
<The_Anti> damn that Alden... he always has to get the final word.

Tue Sep  7
 * Alden sees Erwin has a new home.
<Jondar> yeah...
<Jondar> I wish Illiad would just stick to keeping Erwin in one home :)
<Alden> Dust Puppy could make a fortune if he can write programs that
	work on any platform.
<Nathan_Roberts> LOL
<Jondar> heehee :)
<Jondar> Windows for Tamagotchi!
<Nathan_Roberts> Ha
<Alden> Yeah, just wait til all your files start whining for food.
<Nathan_Roberts> LOLOLOLOLOL

Tue Sep  7
<Nathan_Roberts> New study... Kids who watch TV at night will have
		 trouble getting to sleep.  Duh?
<CrowTRobt> they act like they couldn't figure that out on their own
<CrowTRobt> New Study... People who IRC all night are insomniacs.

Tue Sep 07
<NemoDream> remind me next time I crush a fruit punch container to 
	    keep my head away from the opening...

Tue Sep 07
*** Alryssa changes topic to 'OK, which idiot broke the topic?'
<Blor> Uhm. I wasnt here when it happened. Promise.
 * Alryssa picks Blor up and shakes him
 * Alryssa sees bits of the topic fall out of his coat
 * NemoDream watches change and hundred dollar bills stream to the 
<Alryssa> ooo!
 * Alryssa pounces
<Alryssa> waittaminit.....
<Alryssa> how can you have $15 bills?
<Blor> Thats interesting, especially since our currency is crowns. :)
 * Alryssa looks at Blor
<Blor> Uhm
<Blor> Well...
<Blor> I dont know how they got there.
<Alryssa> and why is Ulrika Jonsson on them?
<Alryssa> naked?
<Blor> ./quit
<Blor> Damn.
<Blor> Well.
<Blor> You see...
<Blor> Uhm.
<Blor> Ehrm.
<Alryssa> Where can I get some? :o)

Thu Sep  9
<Nathan_Roberts> My laptop is a 286...
<Nathan_Roberts> I use the word "laptop" loosely
<random_C> been using it for thigh strengthening, eh, Nate?

Thu Sep  9
<Drake> channels #suicide and do they keep 
	channel regulars?

Fri Sep 10
<Jondar> Alden: <sarcasm> don't you enjoy Friday night nature
	 documentaries >:-) </sarcasm>
<Alden> Jason: my brother does. ;-)
<Alryssa> Alden: Well, to your brother, isn't it like Playboy channel?

Fri Sep 10
<Alden> Wow, if you have a WebTV universal remote control, apparently
	you can use it to control Furby.
<Alryssa> lol
<random_C2> *snigger*
 * random_C2 has ideas about Furby reading out a porn site's content

Fri Sep 10
 * Alryssa fiddles with her Seti@home client
<Edict_of_Expert> Ryss: DIDJA FIND SOMETHING!?!?
<Alryssa> Rusty: Like WHAT? ;-)
<Edict_of_Expert> Ryssa: Intelligent extraterrestrial life, mebbe?
 * Alryssa checks her Seti results and finds that there is indeed no
   intelligent life on #dwc

Fri Sep 10
*** Blor has joined channel #drwhochat
<CrowTRobt> hmm speak of anuses and look who shows up
<Nathan_Roberts> Are you implying Blor is an asshole?
<Whomiga> Crow - LOL
 * Blor unleashes the unholy powers of the evil fishes upon CrowTRobt
<CrowTRobt> heavens no
<Nathan_Roberts> You mean, hell No?

Sat Sep 11
 * Alden sets the jpg quality to 0 and looks at the resulting picture. Weeeeee!
<Theta-G> you madman!
<Alden> only 2k though. ;-)
<Theta-G> somebody STOP him!
<Theta-G> Mr. Alden Bates, you are under arrest under suspicion of
	  first degree image corruption

Sat Sep 11
<Nathan_Roberts> Random: According to Prof, men like to barbecue
		 because there's danger involved...
<Nathan_Roberts> He's the sort of person that puts on enough lighter
		 fluid to create a mushroom cloud that can be seen 3 miles away
<Alden> Hahahahhaa
 * Kiri` makes note never to let Prof bbq near her home.
<TomFODW> let's put another kiloton on the barbie...
<Kiri`> make that country.
<Nathan_Roberts> LOL
<Nathan_Roberts> Planet...?
<Alden> Lighter fuel is for pansies.  Real men use jet fuel. ;-)

Sun Sep 12
<TheProf> Am I the only one who is amused by the name Floyd for a
	  hurricane? I mean it sound like Floyd the red neck hurricane.
<Nathan_Roberts> You're not the only one amused by it... I keep
		 wondering if the hurricane is pink! >;)

Sun Sep 12
*** the_quark has joined channel #drwhochat
<Nathan_Roberts> The Quark.... Now that's a name I haven't heard in a
		 long time.
<the_quark> NR:  Do you know him?
<the_quark> Is he still alive?
<Nathan_Roberts> Quark: I'd give the obvious answer, but it would be wrong ;)
<Nathan_Roberts> Like most obvious answers.
<the_quark> Nate - yeah, I think we've got the wrong lines here.  :)

Sun Sep 12
 * Nathan_Roberts is browsing at: 
 * Ebudae blinks.
 * the_quark fwaps NR
 * Ebudae looks at NR.
<the_quark> I guess the book protocol connects on port 65536?
<Nathan_Roberts> LOL

Sun Sep 12
<TheProf> NickServ Services is currently down. Please wait a few days,
	  and then try again.

Mon Sep 13
<Nathan_Roberts> Nickserv!  Wherefore has thou forsaken thee?
 * TheProf in a loud voice accuses Nickserv's parents of not being married.
<Alden> Nickserv, come hither that I may stuffest this pitchfork up thy ass.
*** TheProf is now known as Guest78692
<Guest78692> LOL!
 * Alden sees nickserv is swift to take vengence.
*** Nathan_Roberts has changed the topic on channel #drwhochat to
    Don't piss off Nickserv.
 * Alden puts the pitchfork down *slowly*

Mon Sep 13
<TheProf> I still expect about 20 weathermen to die in this storm.
<TheProf> They keep saying "This storm is a killer and we are sending
	  our reporter Bob right into the center to report to us. Are
	  you there Bob?" "I'm here and I want to say before I begin
	  my report that I hate all of you at the station and hope you
	  all die slowly."

Mon Sep 13
<TheProf> I told the wife "Are we there yet?" about 20 times during
	  our trip and she hit me every time.

Mon Sep 13
 * Alden has lost all respect for Microsoft.
<Alden> Er, what little respect I actually had, that is.
<Alden> Which wasn't much.
<Alden> If any.
<Alden> No change then. :-)
<Nathan_Roberts> Is it possible to have a negative amount of respect?
<Alden> It's called "contempt", I believe. :-)

Mon Sep 13
<Jondar> question: in webpages: do you prefer white text on black
	 background, or black text on a white background?
<Alden> Black on white.
<Nathan_Roberts> White on black
<Jondar> typical :)
<Nathan_Roberts> LOL

Thu Sep 16
<Nathan_Roberts> If I read a book I won't fall asleep.  I'll just keep
		 reading until I hit EOF.
<dse> EOF?
<Nathan_Roberts> End Of File...
<Nathan_Roberts> That was meant as a joke
<Theta-G> nate is a software construct
<Theta-G> he doesn't sleep 
<Theta-G> he just hits end of file daily

Thu Sep 16
<TheProf> I like the topic tonight. Leaves a lot to the
	  imagination. From my vantage point I see it as the return of Chezwho.
*** Topic for #drwhochat: Oh my God! God No! <whump>
*** Topic set by FolkBoy
 * Nathan_Roberts looks at FolkBoy_Away
<Nathan_Roberts> I don't think FolkBoy even knows who Chezwho is
<TheProf> FolkBoy_Away has been idle 19mins 50secs, 
<TheProf> He still doesn't

Thu Sep 16
 * FolkBoy has a great memory only for useless information. Which,
   naturally, explains why he did well in school.

Fri Sep 17
 * FolkBoy is away (Creating a webpage.)
 * FolkBoy is back.
 * TheProf is away (Going once)
 * TheProf is back.
 * TheProf is away (going twice!)
 * TheProf is back.
*** TheProf has been kicked off channel #drwhochat by Nathan_Roberts (Gone!)

Fri Sep 17
<TheProf> Alden: Most actors are jerks....I should know I use to be one.

Fri Sep 17
<Nathan_Roberts> Did I mention I like Brittany Spears too?
 * Nathan_Roberts awaits the stoning
<FolkBoy> Dude, man, you've got pot?

Fri Sep 17
<dse> now the radio is playing Shania Twain's "That Don't Impress Me Much"
<Lyssie> ah, the song that states exactly what I feel about it...

Fri Sep 17
<Theta-G> I am the dictator of the fourth satellite of Thoros
	  Alpha. As a satellite, is my domain still eligible for
	  membership in the United Federation of Planets?

Fri Sep 17
<Theta-G> Paranoia: the act of thinking to yourself "fuck all you
	  telepaths!" when in a roomful of people

Sat Sep 18
 * Kamelion_Karoake bets she sounds like a fruit
<Kamelion_Karoake> i think everyone has ESP...
<Kamelion_Karoake> just not always able to use it, or know what it is
<Kamelion_Karoake> okay, now that my fruitaciousness has shut everyone up....
<Theta-G> *nod*
<Theta-G> sorry, i was telling the teeps upstairs to piss off

Sat Sep 18
*** JonBlumIsProbablyVeryNiceIfYou has joined channel #drwhochat
<Shel> if you what?
<JonBlumIsProbablyVeryNiceIfYou> If you meet him in the flesh
<MegL> He is
<Fenric6> He is...  
<Nathan_Roberts> He is.  (He says this just so he doesn't feel left out)

Sat Sep 18
<Alden> Nanananananana Bat Alden!
 * Bozzie runs Alden.bat
 * Shel sees bozzies computer crash from the Alden Virus...
<Bozzie> Oh, great. Thanks Alden...
<Bozzie> Though I'd be interested in seeing a virus in bat format ;-)
 * Shel sees bozzie's computer melt into the form of a sheep

Sat Sep 18
<Theta-G> i'm on hold with my isp
<Theta-G> waiting to change my billing info
<Theta-G> it's really surreal
<Theta-G> or surreally real
<Theta-G> it keeps switching back and forth
<Theta-G> between a loop of a girl's voice
<Theta-G> and bold classical music
<Theta-G> at random moments
<Theta-G> all or out representatives are st- DA DA DUM DUM DUM!!!

Sun Sep 19
 * Alden tried to leap dramatically out of a schoolbus once. that
   backfired when I discovered the top of the door was several inches
   lower than I had anticipated.

Sun Sep 19
<Alden> Hehe.  "Waiter!  More dead animal!"  Now there's someone who
	isn't a vegetarian and isn't ashamed of it. ;-)

Sun Sep 19
<FolkBoy> And then there was my sister at age 2.  Mom was on the phone
	  and something got her upset, and she said, "Son of a--" saw
	  my sister and stopped.  My sister said, "Bitch."  Mom
	  decided to stop swearing.

Mon Sep 20
<Nathan_Roberts> I came here to kick assholes and chew bubble gum.
		 And I'm all out of assholes.

Tue Sep 21
<MegL> well your right in that Hitchhikers is not played straight
<MegL> they are going for droll with Lexx
<Alden> It's either meant to be funny, or they're just really bad at
	serious SF. :-)
 * Alden sticks on Yellow Submarine
<Nathan_Roberts> Ah, Alden's discovered something even more weird than Lexx >:)

Wed Sep 22
<TheProf> I live in Kansas. I guess I can stop shaving now.

Wed Sep 22
<Alden> I discovered today that being a computer programmer would be a
	lot easier if you didn't have any users.

Thu Sep 23
<FolkBoy> hey, Nate-I actually got something to work in Linux.  Sort of.
<Nathan_Roberts> Oh?
<TheProf> Yeah......just the keyboard.
 * Nathan_Roberts just slept for several hors
<Nathan_Roberts> hors
<Nathan_Roberts> hors
<Nathan_Roberts> hors
<Nathan_Roberts> hours
<TheProf> I will not tolerate that language Nathan!
<FolkBoy> I thought whores prefered you to be awake.

Thu Sep 23
 * TheProf plans to make millions off this Y2K thing. When the power
   fails and the end is here I will sell the one thing all these
   people who are buying up tons of canned goods will have
   forgotten......a nonelectric can opener.
 * Alden has a non-electric can opener. It's called a "sledge hammer"

Fri Sep 24
<Alden> Whoa, I have a folder full of RADW stats from 1997
<InfraViolet> deltree
<InfraViolet> deltree
<InfraViolet> deltree

Fri Sep 24
<Alryssa> I hate AOL.
<Nathan_Roberts> AOL... Alryssa Off Line?

Sat Sep 25
<mrbean^> Doesn't mean we can't beg. Anyone got a spare quarter?
 * NathanR flicks Prof a nickel
<mrbean^> Cheapskate.
 * Jondar flings quarter of a cream pie at Prof
<Alden> Yeah, take pity on someone who can't afford capital letters in his nick
 * Alden flips Prof a 'P'
 * NathanR flips Prof a finger

Sat Sep 25
<TheProf> One of the boats for one of the water rides at the park has
	  skelitons riding in it. They are already set for halloween.
 * Alden wonders if the skeletons throw up at the end of the ride
<TheProf> LOL
<Alden> You'd end up with little piles of bones

Sat Sep 25
<TheProf> The wife was making fun of my new drivers licence photo so
	  yesterday it was her turn to get hers so I stood behind the
	  guy taking the picture and before he took it I made a goofy
	  face at her. She tried not to laugh but started to and then
	  click!! Her picture came out goofy as hell and she was
	  peeved. >:o)

Mon Sep 27
<Theta-G> bun of a sitch

Wed Sep 29
<Nathan_Roberts> Thete: You could always do what I do... smash your
		 fists into your equipment (the keyboard in particular0
<Theta-G> LOL nate
 * Alden looks under Nate's desk for missing keytops
<Theta-G> like i need a penciltip key ;-)
<Theta-G> no, i could never bash something that i *need*
<Theta-G> pity i don't have a chia pet

Wed Sep 29
<Nathan_Roberts> "Sexually focused chronologically gifted male - dirty old man"
<Alryssa> *titter*
<Alryssa> <tom> I resemble that last remark!
<Nathan_Roberts> ROTFL
 * Alryssa thinks that resembles the 8th Doctor to a T.
<Alryssa> 1000 year old Time Lord gets off with mid-30 year old human
<Alryssa> there's a headline for you.

Wed Sep 29
 * Alryssa hears Tom singing in the bathroom. I think the Oreo O's did
<MegL> hehehe
<Nathan_Roberts> LOL
<Alryssa> this is the last time I let him eat cereal at 5am.
<Alryssa> must be something in the milk...

Thu Sep 30
<Alden> Nate: I didn't have anything to do at work today, so I
	implemented a favourates/bookmarks list in Yikes
<Alden> Except I'm not as organised, so it's "Piles"

Thu Sep 30
<Nathan_Roberts> A bug in k9!!
<Alden> !!
<Nathan_Roberts> Why didn't someone tell me it was broken!
<Alden> Nate: They never do.
<Nathan_Roberts> You have that problem too?
<Alden> Yup.
<Alden> The trick is, only the *paying* customers tell you about the bug.
<Alden> And then not all of them either.
<Nathan_Roberts> You know something, Alden?
<Nathan_Roberts> Being a programmer would be a lot easier if you
		 didn't have any users.

Thu Sep 30
<TheProf> I wish the nutcases would make up their minds. three years
	  ago magnetic firlds were deadly things. Now they have the
	  power to cure everthing and you can buy them to strap on
	  your legs, head and even put in your shoes.

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