The #drwhochat Quotefile

Special Feature:

Anti-Microsoft Jokes

Contributed by LisaG:
Windows 95: n. 32 bit extensions and a graphical shell for a 16 bit patch to an 8 bit operating system originally coded for a 4 bit microprocessor, written by a 2 bit company, that can't stand 1 bit of competition.

Contributed by Nathan_Roberts:
How many microsoft programmers does it take to make a truly excellent product?


Contributed by Nathan_Roberts:
God is unhappy with the way things are going on Earth, so he summons the three people he thinks are the most important people on Earth: Bill Clinton, Boris Yeltson, and Bill Gates... (Why does that seem like a joke within a joke?) He says to them, "I want you to tell your people that I'm not happy with the way things are going on Earth, and in two weeks, I'm going to blow it up and start over." So, the three people go back to earth. Bill Clinton addresses the Nation, saying "I have Good News, and I have Bad News... The Good News is that there Is a god, the bad news is that he's not happy and is going to destroy the world." Boris Yeltson addresses Russia, saying "I have Bad News, and I have Worse News. The Bad News is that there Is a god, the worse news is that he's going to destroy the world." Bill Gates addresses the Microsoft staff, saying, "I have Good News and I have Great News... The Good News is that there Is a god, and the Great News is that we won't have to fix Windows 95!!"

Contributed by Starfury:
Three women were sitting around talking about their husbands' performance as a lover. The first woman says "My Husband works as a marriage counselor. He always buys me flowers and candy before we make love. I like that." The second woman says, "My husband is a motorcycle mechanic. He likes to play rough and slaps me around sometimes. I kinda like that." The third woman just shakes her head and says, "My husband works for Microsoft. He just sits on the edge of the bed and tells me how great it's going to be when I get it."

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